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I decided to get back to why I created the business in the first place...

"I had this expectation that being an entrepreneur would give me freedom. When I started my business, I was traveling around, working wherever I wanted. I felt free. As the business started growing, we started hiring employees, we had an office — suddenly, I became the least free person there. It felt good for a while, actually. Like, my ego was stroked a bit. I thought it was cool to be needed, and my self-worth was tied to hard work. Not just hard work, actually, it was tied to suffering and pain. I used to wear it like a badge. That way, when something good would happen, I could actually feel like I deserved it. I can even see now how I self-sabotaged to work even harder. So, all of a sudden, I felt like I was in this prison and there was a breaking point, probably like three years ago, where I was super depressed. I was drinking every night trying to ignore it. We were losing employees. We were losing clients. I felt like a terrible leader. Financially, the business was actually fine, which was the weird thing. It was the most money I'd ever made, but I was the least happy. I thought about shutting down the business and starting over but, instead, I decided to get back to why I created the business in the first place and redesign the business around that. I basically said, 'Okay, what are my non-negotiables?' Listing them out was one thing. Now I have to keep them top of mind. Because if they're not top of mind, it's so easy to go back into old habits that are essentially programmed into not only my subconscious, but the subconscious of the people I work with. So I have to reprogram myself, my relationships, and my business. It's taken me a long time and I'm still growing, but I feel like I've finally recaptured my freedom. It almost doesn't feel real, to be honest. I even feel guilty sometimes. But this is why I became an entrepreneur."

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